010. - Cat Marnell

All right, this episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by Stateside with Kai and Carter, a new podcast from The Guardian. And they are using this podcast to slow down the news and wrestle with the questions that we all have about what's happening in the world. And they do it three times a week. Jason, does that sound familiar to you? We don't really talk about, you know, a lot of international global news items and climates and cultures and sports and things like that. We do talk about fashion and wellness, but for everything else, Kai and Carter are a great place. All right, so who couldn't use more news? Listen wherever you get your podcast. or watch on YouTube. Want to make a podcast? Spotify's got a platform that lets you make one super easily, then distribute it everywhere, and even earn money. We like that. All in one place for totally free. It's called Spotify for Podcasters. And here's how it works. Spotify for podcasters lets you record and edit podcasts right from your cellular telephone or your computer. So no matter what your setup is like, you can start creating today. Then you can distribute your podcast to Spotify and everywhere else, those other places that podcasts are heard. Video podcasts are also available on Spotify. And when you want to take conversations with your fans to the next level, Q&As and polls are the best way to get them talking. With Spotify for podcasters, you can earn money in a variety of ways, including ads and... and podcast subscriptions. And best of all, it's totally free. Zero catch. We've been using it ever since we started How Long Gone. And ever since I discovered Spotify for Podcasters, I feel like having the option of turning off the Q&As and the polls on the user dashboard has really helped boost my creativity and take it to another level. I highly recommend giving it a try. Download the Spotify for Podcasters app or go to www.spotify.com slash podcasters to get started.

Hello. What up, Teej? Teej in the building. How you feeling, Kay? Pretty good. I'm currently upstate. Bitch, you don't have upstate in California. Stop trying to steal our swag. We literally do have an upstate. The state is very big. That's true. I'm upstate. I'm at the lake house. Damn, he's at the lake house. So you're one of those obnoxious rich people who leaves the big city and goes and crushes a small city and cleans up their grocery store. That is exactly what I am. I'm all up in Stater Brothers, no mask on. What's the vibe at Arrowhead? The vibe in Lake Arrowhead is dark. They haven't received any memo about businesses closing or social distancing fire i'm on the first plane there's like when you go to a market there'll be a sign that says like social distancing make sure you do it but like everybody here nobody gives a shit and then every retail store is totally open like mattress store shoe repair furniture The vintage clothing, it's all open. Really? Yes. That's fire. I love this. I love when people disobey. I read this. Tyler Brule, the famously obnoxious editor-in-chief and creator of Monocle, he used to have a Financial Times column on Sunday, but I think they kicked him off because he would plug his clients in the column, which is also fire. I like that. That costs extra. Exactly. That costs a little extra. But he writes a letter every Sunday to the Monocle subscribers, and it's just insane. He's talking about going to his chalet and just completely not obeying any rules either. Well, I mean, if he owns Monocle, he's probably going to the chalet to go fix it up for selling because he's going to need some income soon.

Why? No, Monocle subscribers are high-income individuals. They have some retail, don't they? Just a few. That portion of it, I think, is smaller than it used to be. Those are probably some sweetheart deals as well. I think everything he does is a sweetheart deal. Not a bad place to be. I like him because he's so obnoxious, but that's just me. That's why I like you, too. He sounds like an older, more successful you. Yeah, thank you for that. He's Canadian and gay, which I'm close to both of those things, so it's no different, really. Jesus, this man is you. He has a similar sunglasses frame to you, I'm assuming? Actually, I don't think he wears glasses. But, you know, after this head shave, I'm considering going contacts and getting the surgery. I think I look tougher and cooler if I don't have glasses on. Well, you think? Shut up, loser. I think that – but you've been a glasses man so long that whenever I see you without them, you look odd. It's like seeing a raccoon in the daytime. It just doesn't sit well with me. Thank you for that comparison. I think that I could become – but I think when I come out of this isolation cocoon, I could just be a whole new person. Well, I mean, we're all going to be whole new people. Yeah, but I mean like in a cool, sexy way. You're going to cocoon literally into your butterfly. Exactly. At the very least, by the end of this, you are going to emerge Canadian and gay just by proxy. That's true. That's not even up for discussion. I couldn't agree more. I want to talk about some content I saw you creating this morning on Instagram stories. Oh, okay. I thought you never asked. I noticed that you were making some fucking cinnamon rolls, and I just wanted to say it looked incredible. I've never made cinnamon rolls before, but we're broadening our horizons. They were slapping, man. How many did you eat? I had two, but they're small ones. Very small. So there's some left, you're saying? We're sitting on six more, bro.

Fire up. Hit the Canada Post, mate. I will send you a link to the recipe. You guys can make it. It's not that hard. That's too dangerous, bro. There's yeast involved. There's proving. You're not going to do it. No, hell no. It looked also like a dog took a shit on the dough. That wasn't very appealing. When you roll the dough out and then you have to smear on the filling, like the cinnamon sugar. kind of feeling that swirled into the cinnamon roll and it did come out looking unfortunately more like something you'd find in the toilet than the kitchen and I know that's a big Chris pet peeve you're highly against scat play and I appreciate that yeah that's what I think you have a hard stance That's what I think about when I think about things I'm against is scat play is number one on the record. That kind of stuff, when we were talking to Flynn on the last episode, when he was talking about going upstate, literally, and enjoying Folger's coffee and taking a break from your precious little East Village life and fourth wave coffee. farmer's market produce and just eating regular supermarket stuff, Folgers coffee, all that shit. I think, and I've been experiencing that up in the head, and it really is important to remind yourself just how good we have it. Fuck out of here. I don't feel like I have it that good right now, motherfucker. I'm trapped inside. All I want is gourmet. I'm about to take a bath and soak in some expensive oils or something just to feel something again. I know, I know, but it's... But that's sort of what the whole point of drinking Folgers coffee for a week is when you come back, your normal shit just looks amazing again. If you were really a salt-of-the-earth guy, you would have had some Pillsbury fucking cinnamon rolls like Fat Chris in middle school. Or I would have looked up a Paladin recipe instead of some Kinfolk one. Where'd the recipe come from?

I came from serious eats.com. That sounds, it's not an amateur site just to let you know. It sounds a little bit off brand. I thought we only did like NYT cooking. Um, I don't do any paywall recipes. You, you hate, you hate paying for stuff. That's true. I don't mind it. If it, if I really like, there's nothing on New York times cooking that I can't find somewhere else. Just as good. Oh, I didn't realize it was behind the paywall. I guess I should have known. It is. Whenever I see it, I'm not like, oh, I got to figure out some hack or get some VPN firewall blocker thing so I could hack in and read this Wall Street Journal article about fucking socks that Gallagher wrote. But as soon as I see it, I just turn it off and then I forget about it forever. That's smart. That's how I approach life in general. That's great to know. Good to know, bro. Can't do it. Turn it off immediately. I did think of you when I saw the Jerry Saltz coffee expedition. He is such an idiot, dude. That is so dumb. I love it. I mean, it's funny. But like bad coffee, like transporting 18 cups of bad coffee and putting it in the freezer is disgusting. That's art, bro. Some people have a real addiction to that certain type of coffee or that certain type of anything. I do know. Some people just got to have fucking Ruffles chips or something. Damn, Ruffles are fine. Ruffles have ridges. Ruffles have ridges in the air fire. Don't call me Wonder Bread on this podcast, bitch. I'll come for you. Hey, Wonder Bread. That's my streetball name. Because I wonder how you got all this bread. Exactly. Damn, that's fire. That is a little fire. That's my rap name now, too. Alright, we should get prepared to call our guest. Today, we're talking to the legendary writer and personality, Kat Marnell.

who informed me after two and a half years of, of traveling the world, she's, she's settled back in New York. Um, so we can get into that with her, but she's also, um, her and I have a lot in common. Um, like what? She really likes libertines. Uh, and, and, um, I'm sure there's some other stuff. Like I don't wear wigs, but I probably would. There is some other stuff. Maybe drug use is one of them? Yeah, drug use is definitely one of them. We can get into it. That's kind of a given when you mention a love of the Libertines. That's true. I mean, you like the Teens, don't you? I mean, yeah, I'm cool with the Libertines. They're just a band that I kind of forgot about and don't really... They're not in my daily rotation, we'll say. But I have nothing against them. Yeah, there's no EDM remix for you, so I figure that's not really a road of your street. There probably is. Let me call her. Let me call her. Let me call her. You're going to make a Libertine's EDM remix for the outro of this episode. There's a chance I already have, and I forgot. All right, all right. All right, this episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by Quince. Jason, the temps are warming up. It's getting hot out there. Summer always changes how I get dressed. I need pieces that feel lighter, more breathable. And they're just easy, but, you know, still put together. I don't want to look like a slob. That's why I keep coming back to Quince. You know, they focus on high-quality essentials that feel and look amazing. Breathable linen and soft organic cottons. Well-made basics, but without the luxury markups. That rare balance where everything feels elevated. but still effortless. Yeah, Chris, linen season is here. I wore a linen blazer to dinner a few nights ago in the warm California sun. But you know, you got that Italy trip coming up this summer and quality European linen pants and shirts. Upgrade that look starting at just $34. You know, if you get a nice linen suit, a little t-shirt underneath it, some chill shoes, you're looking good, but you're staying cool. The inside of your special areas are nice and dry as you turn up with your besties. So elevate that summer wardrobe. Go to quince.com slash how long for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns, even on a nice holiday now available in Canada.

That is Q-U-I-N-C-E dot com slash how long. That'll get you free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince punto com slash how long. This episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by a new podcast from The Guardian stateside with Kai and Carter. This is covering a lot of our bases, Jason. It's trying to slow down. the news and wrestle with the questions we all have about what's happening in the world and i know you particularly have quite a lot of questions a lot of questions but how often because we do this podcast three times a week and that's a sweet spot how many times do they do three times a week and i i have a feeling just based on the platform and these talking points that they're maybe going to be covering different stuff than we do that's just a guess the guardian is not some billionaire owned They're not afraid to say what they want to say, brother. Yeah, Rupert ain't sniffing around in what journalists Kai Wright and Carter Sherman are up to over there at Stateside. But yeah, listen wherever you get your podcasts. You can watch it on YouTube. It's three times a week. And who couldn't use more news? Especially when it's not from here, let's say. Give it a listen. Give it a listen. This episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by Squarespace. Obviously, Jason, you and I spend a lot of time on the World Wide Web, so do our peers, our listeners, our friends, our colleagues, maybe even your parents if they're freaky. And if you're doing anything in the world... writing, taking pictures. I do topless boxing. You need a website. Exactly. A website that works, that does what it's supposed to do, that allows you to be creative, but also business minded. Jason, there's one place to go for that. Squarespace. Yeah, Chris, I'm over here. I'm modifying calculators and putting Claude inside of them so you could cheat at school. And I just want a place where I could, you know. have everything all in one place. I can have the SEO tools so those future graduates can find me. And, you know, I'm able to accept quote unquote donations for my services that might be gray area. You know what I mean? And then email campaigns. Hey, I got a new, you know, 2.3 version upgrade. Boom, boom, boom. Get the analytics going. Raise some money.

Show your investor all of your cool analytics of what's going on. They're going to want to get in early, and we can use Blueprint AI to make your website look as professional as your competition, if not more. So head to squarespace.com slash howlong for a free trial. When you're ready to launch, use offer code howlong to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or a domain. Chris? Yes? Cut. I'm wearing my eyes. You know my favorite look for quarantine is like when Galliano got in trouble for the racial slurs. Or no, when he was in Paris and he was like, oh, Hitler was this and that. And then he walked around covered with a cloth all the time. Yes, he was mummified. Yeah, that's what I've been doing in my quarantine. That's a good look for you. And also, then my lens is broken. Kat, I think we need to tell the listeners the journey we just went through to get you on the phone. I don't think we can just jump into this. So can you just run down your technology lineup for us, please, at home? Currently, I have a broken iPhone 6. Okay. Oh, wow. Fire, fire. Okay, good. Even better. So many times. But it keeps coming back. The 6 is never die. Like a cockroach. Yeah. And I'm like, oh, great. I can get another phone. But I travel so much, I never actually want a good phone. And then same with my computer. I have this thing where I water damage my computer two days before I'm supposed to go abroad. I've spilled Perrier on two MacBook Airs. So finally, I can't keep doing this. It's the exact same thing that happens. And I'm like, I can't fucking believe it. Because I'll have a Perrier in my bed with me. I won't use the glass bottles anymore, you know, the big, like, glass things. Oh, I do know. I get water on my computer and I ruin it. Hold on. Are you a Perrier? Right before I just leave. And so then I'm like, oh, I just need to order another computer. And that's when I started using, like, refurbished computers. And so they're so old, but they're only, like, $300. And then I don't worry about them. Well, are you? So I'm like, if I lose my backpack in fucking Egypt. It's like, all right, loser.

You have burner laptops. Yeah, basically. You have a burner laptop is what you're saying, basically. Well, so I have two questions. Is Perrier your preferred sparkling water? That's a surprise to me. Always. Wait, it's a surprise? It is a surprise, I have to say. I don't want to deal with it. I don't love Perrier, personally. Excuse me. First of all, Perrier is like healthy champagne. Period doesn't have the best bubbles. They have the most. It has the best bubbles. When you open, like my favorite is the big green bottles plastic. And I'll also get the smaller ones if I'm at like 7-Eleven. But they just open and it's like a rocket. But it doesn't overflow. Have you had the red, the red bad wah? The like intense. The red bottle bad wall, that's the highest bubble content I've ever experienced. No, I've never even thought of it. It's a Europe exclusive. I've only seen it in Paris. You've got to get the red bottom, though, only. I live and die in Europe. Well, then you're going to die with a bad wall in your hand, hopefully, because it's only available there. Well, where do you get these refurbished laptops? Where do you get these laptops from? Where are they selling $300? Walmart.com? Yeah. You're buying MacBook Airs on Walmart.com? I love that. No, this is okay. I was in a panic situation. And I was like, should I do things? You're like, oh my god, I have MacBook Air. I'm a writer. I'm leaving to write. And I'd be going to a place. It's like I was going to France. I don't know what it was. But I was like, I... You immediately go through in your head. You're like, okay, fixing this is going to cost the same as a computer. I don't know what that fucking racket is. It's incredible. It's incredible. I agree. I've done it before. Yeah, it costs $900 or something to fucking fix water damage. Who do they think they are? So I usually refuse to do that. So I was like, I have two options within 36 hours. I can either do the thing for Craigslist. Can I meet you at a coffee shop? And some kid tells you his MacBook Air. It's great. And you have to trust him. Or I could do...

refurbished from walmart.com which comes with insurance and apparently like I researched it and the insurance is like Ethereum you know like cell phones and when something's wrong with it they just send you a new computer in the mail like really fast I think this is a hack that you've discovered I have to be honest because I've never thought about Walmart yeah it's really working out so great for me we just took like a full hour and just the other day I do some ghost editing work. First of all, this issue we just had with the phone, I just had with my client, who's as high-ranking and powerful and fancy in the fashion industry as you could possibly get. Huge, big-deal person. So you're saying this person is a bigger deal than me or Jason? Is that what you're saying? Yeah, this person's a bigger deal than fucking Anna Winkler, I'm telling you. But I'll tell you all. She's amazing. But I had to do this call with her and it was just... You couldn't get it done. Well, so you told me when we were setting this up that you have, after two and a half years on the road, you've landed back in New York. Yeah, I'm really glad to be here. Obviously, I came back to my comfort zone, which is chaos. And we're all leaving. I'm like, yeah, this is when I should be here. But you were doing, I mean, I followed your journey and you were going to like insane countries and like living in a hostel, right? Like you weren't, it wasn't. I've done it all. The hostels. What is, what is the appeal? Do you just need to keep moving? There's no appeal. But some places you really like want to do. I didn't realize that until I, I had never been in one. I started traveling and that first one I really went to, or like I would say them, but I'd rent out a whole room, like four beds. Yeah. Like real baller shit. Real baller shit. Yeah. I didn't understand. I like, I didn't get it. And I was so stupid. I didn't know anything. And, but then finally when I was in like Albania and it was, I'd only been traveling. It was only like.

two months on the road I was in Albania and that's when I went to one for the first time and I was so scared I don't know what I thought it was gonna be because it's like you're like what could this possibly be for like nine dollars a night but then you realize it's this whole thing I mean it's disgusting but I have never stayed I know we don't know each other but like I've never stayed in the hostel it's really not a thing I would ever do but you're doing it because it's just If you want to live the lifestyle that you're living, that's the only way to do it, basically. Oh, no. It's not like I do that all the time. I'm in them probably 15% of the time. Oh, okay. Never mind. So you're not as insane as I thought you were. Okay. I thought you were truly falling off the wagon. No. No. It's completely financial. Well, I was just traveling in a way I was super addicted to it. And so I was doing it at the expense of everything, including comfort. I was just like, I gotta go. So what is the draw or the... Why did you get an addiction to traveling like this? Or what is fueling the addiction, I guess? You're a maniac? I don't know. That's okay. It's like the equivalent of like... flipping through like a huge stack of like magazines. Now you're talking about language. Yeah. Yeah. It's the world. I understand that. Looking at this, looking at this, looking at this, next, next, flip, flip, flip. You know, I was just like, and then I just kept going. How long would you stay in one place? Obviously it depends, but like what was the, did you, if you liked somewhere, would you just kick it for a while or would you just need to keep going? Okay. I'd force myself to. So what are we talking about? I just was in London for a month. I was considering moving there, but I'm not doing that. I'm coming back here. So, well, we're happy to have you back in the greatest city on earth. You know what I mean? It's very important for us to keep our talent close, you know? What are you doing? So what are you doing now? Like, what's really good? What's going on? For the quarantine, I'm in an Airbnb in Bushwick. Yeah, so I've always done this.

Combinations of hotels, Airbnb, and then hostels. But really not hostels that much. I mean. So you're in an Airbnb. You're quarantined alone in Airbnb and Bushwick. Yeah. Okay. That sounds. But I was trying to go upstate. I kicked out of my thing upstate. I do. The nightmare that I had, like when this whole pandemic broke out, I was in Cairo. In the middle of a dragon flood, which is this, a dragon storm. It's this, like, crazy thing that happens. Dragon storm? Yeah, it was called the dragon storm. Kat, are you trying to tell us that you're into anime? That sounds like one of my online games. Exactly. No. This city, which is already... I've been there, actually. I went there recently. It's insane there. I can't believe that people go there so much. Like, I can handle anything. That place is fucking bonkers. I'm good. I never need to go again. No, never again. I'm all set. I was expecting to love my friends. It's so magical. I was like, I couldn't believe it. But, like, after this flood, came the entire city, obviously. I mean, they're not used to having rain, you know. And the city flooded, and everything was closed for weeks. Or not weeks. I guess, like, a week. And the electricity everywhere. The people were getting electrocuted from the water. I would watch a wire dangling outside the window. My air conditioning was just flickering. It was on bright spark. And I was on the 11th floor. And this thing was just like dancing. This loose, broken wire. I was like, this is so scary. I had to take a sleeping pill. I was like, I can't go to sleep. This is real homeland hours right now. No, that's my part. I think my dad honestly thinks that I'm... Because then I had to call him and be like, so I'm in the Middle East. I'm like, whatever. Hey, Dad. Are you on a mission or something? It's like hardcore Republican and never tell him where I'm going until after because he's like, what? You're behind enemy lands. And then I was supposed to go to Beirut after because, you know, J.J. Brine, the Satanist to the stars who turned Amanda Bynes to Satanism from Vector Gallery.

No, I don't know, but I would love for you to tell us. Go on. Continue. Lebanese guys. Lebanese guys are hot. He told me about the amazing gay scene in Beirut. Okay. It's all like, I mean, it's the gay place to go. The Castro of the Middle East. Pardon? The Castro of the Middle East. Yeah. Okay. The Castro of the Middle East. And so I was on my flight there, and then my dad, he's like, no, whatever. And then the borders were setting down, and the whole thing. was just getting so complicated. Like, all the flights I was getting canceled spent so much money. Then I had to go into Paris, like, right when everything on the day Paris shut down and locked down. I was there because I skipped Lebanon and went. And I was like, there was a line of Americans from Cairo getting on the flight to the UK, like a huge line. And then no one trying to get to France. Only me. It was like an empty plan. And I was like, I'm a fucking idiot. And then... And then I was like... Everyone is like, and I couldn't even get an Airbnb. People were like turning me down, being like, where were you? I was like, I was an idiot. So I finally got one there in Belleville, and then I came back here. So you went from Cairo to Paris, back to New York? To Newark. To downtown Newark. Thank you for making that distinction. Because I work with Audible. It's crazy over there. Is Audible in Newark? Yes. Damn, that's dark. Newark is fucking crazy. But it's my home away from home. It's the Cairo of New York. Yeah, it kind of is. So you were supposed to go upstate to ride this out? Yeah. So then I found a fucking Airbnb upstate in Troy. I'm never believing these tourist boards ever again.

They're like, oh, this artistic. It's like a depressed fucking town. Like so many of them on the Hudson. No, that's some like, that's some opioid crisis shit. Yeah. Again, I'm down with almost any vibe. We'll give it a shot. It's this huge church on Airbnb and you can rent it for $30 a night. It's monks quarters. They're like, oh, like writers love it here. This and that. So I got like. in caves there. And on my third day, they just, they're like, oh, like, by the way, like, we need to, like, you have to leave because this, that, and the other. Like, it's this long story. I told the people who arrived that I'd been in France and I think they called them. Damn, they ratted you out. You've been here, like, but they were from New York. They were from fucking Brooklyn. So I had to leave in, like, the middle of a snowstorm. How'd you get back? Are you driving? I took, no, I don't know how to drive. I didn't think so. You don't strike me as a driver, to be honest. So I took an Amtrak, and again, I'm the only person on the Amtrak. This is after I've had two different Airbnbs in Newark, and then the train up there, fucking Uber, and I'm supposed to be quarantined and back, and then I was like, I'm going to go right into the thick of it. New York City. Because everyone had left. So the Airbnbs were all 60% cheaper than they usually were. This Airbnb website is not lying. I think Airbnb is one of the worst websites of all time. I would agree with you. Airbnb is really taking a shit right now. What? Airbnb is really taking a shit right now. Good. And all the people that host as well, they're kind of fucked. Which, good, right? Anyway, I'm here. Well, what is your, so I just, are you able to work now? Are you going to leave? Are you going to stay? Are you going to go to your parents? Like, what are you going to do? I can't go to my mom because she has diabetes. Okay. And you definitely have Corona, so you should stay away from your mom. I have my mom. You definitely have it. Are you, are you, um.

nothing I can do about this. The packed, anxious buses getting on and off these planes, the airport, customs, and Newark, Charles Legault, everywhere. I thought Whole Foods was tough. Yeah, right. Whole Foods Glendale is a scene, but nothing like this. Everyone is all freaked out. I'm like, this is like a cakewalk. I'll throw it to the fucking grocery store. How do you feel? Do you have a mask and gloves and shit, or are you just out here free-balling it? I don't know. I can't get those gloves. And the mask I have, it gave me some symptoms. It was so tight. It was like I couldn't see it, and then I would take it off, and my eyes and my nose would be watering, and my face would be hot. So I was like, I can't be wearing this before I go through customs, because it was like, and it had a big duck beak. I don't know what the fuck it was. Was this a promotional mask for a movie release or something? No. First of all, the mask situation is so gross. When you get off, I was in Herald Square after I bought masks. I tried to buy them in London. From London, I had to go to Malta when this all first started, and then Jordan, but I had to go to Cairo, Beirut, and then go back. Instead, yeah, so Malta was fine. But I was in London trying to get masks. And, of course, there they'd all, they were, like, probably just charged, like, 50 pounds or something for a box of, like, 30. Like, it was just already, the prices were getting jacked up and it was all fucked up. And so then I wound up buying masks in Cairo. And also, like, some very shady hand sanitizer that was just, like, I don't think it was real. It was just like glue. I would just put it on my hands and my hands would be like gooey. You bought Elmer's glue. Yeah, you put glue on your hands and thought it was that. People kept selling me I think it was just antibacterial spray. I don't know if it was real. I think they were just selling you things that you put on a blister. I don't know what the fuck it was. None of it was real.

Well, Kat, we've been talking on the podcast lately about how this has turned us into a detox or a cleanse from our normal privileged lives. If traveling has been such a big part of your life, are you enjoying taking a break from that? Are you leaning into it or is it fucking you up? Anytime I'm in the United States, it feels like I'm in paradise. So then why do you constantly leave it? Well, I don't know, you know. What if you started crying? I don't know. I'm glad I have, like, all the adventures. But I was going to stop frowning anyway, but this is good. This is, like, but I am, like, no matter what, I mean, I would try to stop. I would go on up. Google flights. And just start messing around. And then I get stopped. You know, anything I had to do. I just had to. You like a good deal? Yeah, who doesn't love a good deal? I hope all of these fucking cheap airlines I've flown go out of business. Don't worry, they will. something, which I rarely do, but occasionally it happens on these cheap airlines. There's not even anyone at the desk five minutes after it's closed, and then you can never get them on the phone. You can never take the next flight or do something. You know what I mean? Never. There's nothing like that. How light do you travel? Not at all. You have a giant bag with all your clothes in it? I travel with Samsonite, the hard sell suitcases with the buckles, no zipper. Yes, I do. Very European ones. Yeah. I can live and die for them. Do you get them wrapped in plastic like a true European tourist? Oh, I forgot. I went to Tbilisi. This is all in the past two months. And so this fucking communist elevator, you have to put a dime in or whatever. You have to make it.

open where there's an elevator where you have to put money in to use it yeah oh i love it it's like a toilet it has no motion detector and so it crunched on my suitcase my plastic suitcase which is and these samsonites are amazing like they should anyway and the whole thing went and the buckle pops like at the bottom and i was like like i was like screaming like because it was like my child was in it like it wouldn't open and it was like And the wheel got all fucked up, yo. This sounds traumatizing, but... I mean, what is there that you don't get into, Kat? It is... I'm feeling for you. It's exhausting. Do you... So do you need to, like, work at some point? Or you, like... I work, of course. I do work... Like right now I'm both editing someone else's book and that's like a year long project. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So like, you know, and then, you know, I had this audible thing come out last year. I mean, can you tell me like right now? I want to hear about, I want to hear about the, I want to hear about the audible thing because I don't know how that stuff works. My friend sold a podcast and like a fictional podcast and he seemed pretty happy with the whole process, but I would love to hear how it went down. Cause I'm pretty unfamiliar with that. And if you have any connections there for us as well. Oh, yeah. Andrew. Andrew Eisenman. He finds all the original contacts. Oh, yeah. You can pitch him anything. He always wants stuff from me. I do. I try to do it, but I sent him my one friend. I think my friend was, like, too weird for him. But, yeah. So how it works. Well, it worked for me that they were looking for original content from office. People liked my audio book from my first book. Andrew hit up my agent and then he wanted some original content. Can you blame the guy? This was like a few years ago. But really how it works is you just then I sent it in and then you go to Newark and you record and it's really hard. So yeah, I was in downtown Newark.

How long did it take you to record that? Well, how many pages is this book written and then how long did it take you to record it? Like 60,000 words. Maybe that's how much I was. Not knowing the answer to that question means that you have won whatever thing is going on. Yeah. I'm burned the fuck out. I don't know if you can help. I mean, everyone's burnt out right now, but you must be a little extra special burnt out because we're all burnt out and we've just been watching Netflix. You've been in communist elevators. I have the finer things in life, which is human in a... You know how, like, demented you have to be to be, like, be able to live abroad for so long and just be like, blah, blah, blah, like, and not have, like, human contact or, like, normal, like, I'm crazy like that. And it's not. It's very strange. Like, I mean. Do you like that part about you? Pardon? Do you like that part about you? No. No. But that's just. No, not at all. Like if you're in London, you have friends or whatever, but in some of these places, obviously, you don't have friends. So you're going weeks without talking or seeing anyone. Yeah. How many languages do you speak? Barely any. I mean, I have high school Spanish and then very beginner French that I work on because I love France. Don't we all? That was where I was. I was there pretty close to this, this whole meltdown too. And I came back just in time. Yeah, I was in Paris. I got back to New York on like March 10th, I think, which it wasn't crazy, crazy yet, but it was definitely like people were talking about it. Well, I think it's pretty crazy. It all started in that Athera ski. Then like in Europe, you know, it was all like the parties after the ski resorts.

Oh, is that how it spread? 60 people. Damn. Well, so what are you doing during quarantine? Like, how are you spending your time? Let's walk through a day in Kat Marnell's life in quarantine in Bushwick. Okay. I do the exact same thing every day. I wake up at, like, 10. It's pretty late, Kat. That's pretty late. I've been sleeping so heavy, though. I've been, like, letting my time. I'm an athlete. Same. Wow. Same. Finally. Finally. Go. Okay. Continue. I don't even want to. I've been sleeping like crazy. I feel like a brick has been knocked on my head. I've been sleeping so heavy. I think it's like I'm so close to M train. It's like this amazing rumble. It's like. It's a lullaby. It's an urban lullaby for you. Yeah. Anyway, I wake up. cereal that i bought at the fucking overpriced garbage drugs i mean supermarkets around here like a fancy cereal called i don't know it's something new but it's like protein and no sugar like a fake cereal what kind of milk are you putting in that it's like a keto cereal almond milk it's called the cereal so i just threw away the box and get it i eat the exact same thing and then i put strawberries in it and almond milk okay I double tea bag tea. I ran out of English tea and the American tea was trash. So you're doubling up on your bags. Yeah, I am. That's fine. No shame. Then I do disgusting coffee because there's no coffee. There's like a French press. And I keep getting the grind wrong. And it's, like, dirt in my mouth. Like, it's just gross. So you do a double T to get your whistle wet for your bad coffee? Yeah. Okay. But then I tried. First of all, I went to the fucking Dunkin' Donuts on Motolab the other day to get a coffee. And this guy was masturbating, like, full out. Like, I saw, like, a hard, like, a huge, like, it was dick. Like, I was so grossed out.

I was like, it was right. And also the coffee wasn't good. And I got a deli coffee. And I was like, I had forgotten how bad it could be. But at least it's reliable. There you go. It's always bad. That's how people are supposed to like Dunkin' Donuts coffee. I did. I used to. But no, all these franchises, like I used to live at Bowery and Canal. And that one that's over there. You know, at that corner. Even I know that one. I know exactly which one you're talking about. By the bridge. See, I knew someone. Yo, they started just making the coffee weaker and weaker and weaker. I guess to save money. I don't know what, like, how was that not regulated? That a coffee, it was so weak. Call the cops. Oh, I would lose it. And then, you know, they started sneaking sugar into my stuff all the time as like a trick. Yo, I'm mad edgy with coffee. I think my worst quality, like, I'm the person, like, if it is wrong, like, I, like, come back and I'm so tight. Like, and I'm never like that about anything. But it's, like, all I want is just for, or I'm the person, if I go to, like, host a coffee in London, I'm like, can I just, like, I, like, I make up a drink. I'll be like, it's like, can I get, it's like a mini cappuccino, like, in the macchiato cup, but I want, like, more foam, but not milk, but, like, you know. Like, it would usually be a macchiato. Like, I make a whole thing. Because I just really want a tiny cappuccino, you know? This is something that you could maybe coin. This could be your signature drink if you really got into it, you know? Do you understand what I mean? These coffees over here are huge and watery. Have you tried a Cortado? Yeah, see, I don't know exactly what that is. It's a tiny cappuccino. It's a tiny cappuccino. Well, that's what I need. Problem solved. Next. We've only hit post-coffee, so what are we doing after we have a trash coffee? And then, you know, I wait for my attention span to kick in. Or whatever.

And it doesn't. Or, you know. But I don't, you know. Then I waste some time. I don't work well in the daytime, even though I try. Like, that's, I usually open some sort of document at this point. Sure, sure, great. And I'm telling you, like, during the day, my mind is, like, I'm constantly, like, you know, with my work right now, like. I am. I'm in the documents. But it's like that part of the writing work where you're the equivalent of being, like, stuck in traffic trying to leave the city and, like, go to the Hamptons. You're like, eh. I can relate, sweetie. I can relate. And, like, get through the traffic. But then I'm just, like, trying to do things. And then finally, but I'm just waiting to get to the point where you, like, pull out and then it's, like, clear. Then you move. But I've been kind of frustrated with quarantine with my work. Are you exercising? Always. But that's probably later in the day. So then I waste some time. Then I like rant on Twitter about something and then I erase it because I'm like, who the fuck do I think I am thinking I know everything? Like, and also, if anything, this isn't good looking on Twitter. Like with a photo of retweeter, so I take it down. I edit my Twitter all day. It's stupid. And then I talk to my friends and then, yeah, but I do. I work a lot. I do work a lot. If I'm working with this other project, then I work on that. Mainly I've been working. And then I go out for a walk. Like a weird little walk. What's weird about this little walk? Bad energy now. It's bad. The energy is bad. Yeah. It is fucked up. So like the endorphins are not going to kick in. Are you listening to a podcast on this weird walk? Well, I listen to, but I don't, my headphone jack doesn't work on my phone. So if I listen to anything, I have to put my phone in my sports bra or something. But it's too loud for New York to be up. And then I was going to do a city bike, and then it didn't work. My credit card is straight. I'm a mess. And then I go to the fucking grocery store for my one big human interaction a day. And I get mango.

Right now I've been eating. So then for lunch I have arugula, spinach, and a veggie burger. Like I always have a vegan or vegetarian lunch. And then I work some more and then I work out. So you work out at like five? During this quarantine I've been doing it. Last time I worked out at 11. So what's the workout? Walk us through. My workout, my main thing, I've always done YouTube fitness. All these articles and now that are like, ooh, that's always what I've been doing. You started this shit. What? You started this shit. Yeah, I invented it. But I have been doing this usually. So I travel at all times with several resistance bands. Yes. A Pilates ball, a straw to inflate the Pilates ball. And then I have the rounds, the bands that are like circles. And then I also have the ones that have. Handles. Handles and long ones. And then I also have a doorstop. So at any time, I can put the doorstop thing in, then loop the long ones around, and then make that into a makeshift Pilates reformer. Oh, shit. That's good. That's really tight. I like that. I travel all times yoga mat, and I do some pretty hard stuff, but I do it short. I do high-intensity work, 30 minutes. Don't do anything like it. Do you run or anything or you just do this Pilates shit inside? Oh, Pilates? Well, no. Pilates is the only part of it. But, you know, I'll switch it up. I don't have any heavy weights with me now. Were you always like this, Kat? Or was this like a newfound thing later on in life with sobriety, perhaps? I'm not sober. Okay. Well, I was only saying that because a lot of people do that. Chris being one of them has really turned up. Yeah, as soon as I stopped partying, I got super crazy into fitness. I've never felt better in my life. I definitely, you know, I got that when ClassPass was first out. And I've always exercised, like always. But half the time, I'd be fucking on speed exercising. Running back and forth over the band.

almost getting hit by little fetishes on bicycles. That was my fitness. When I used to live on the upper east side when I was 20, I would run the hill. I would take Adderall with me. I don't take Adderall anymore. I love fitness. It's always been a big part of my life. But it's cool that you don't really make it a thing. You guys didn't go into the Naomi campus. With Joe? I don't need to watch Naomi Campbell work out with Joe. Are you doing that? No, but I thought you guys were going to talk about it. No, no, no. We had more important stuff to talk about. He had so much knowledge to share. I talk about celebrities with every other person in my life, so I felt like I get out of my system pretty often. Naomi's amazing. I mean, she's truly an icon. How old is she? I'm not exactly sure. 70? No. She looks amazing. She's like 75, I think. Hey, Kat, I wanted to ask you, there's a lot of conspiracy theory talk going on nowadays. Are you interested in that type of stuff? What about how Corona has come from General Petraeus? I mean, that's... After I got kicked out of upstate, I actually went to Stanford, Connecticut for two nights and stayed with my friends there. And my friend's husband, did you hear this say? He told me about General Petraeus. There's a corona connection. I don't really know the details. But what's the conspiracy? I mean, there's just a zillion of them. But I feel like everybody in the world is starting to... be a little bit more into them just because there's so many question marks of what's going on in the world and you're trying to blame it but i mean there's crazy ones like everyone is like all the celebrities are being arrested uh for being like part of a pedophile ring oh yeah tom hanks and oprah and all those people oh yeah that was pretty um funny yeah i noticed i noticed that um well of course

Chris does the same for the Office cast. You know, who dated, like, Lee Razwell and shared the Montauk house out with Andy and Halston and all of that. They're like, oh, like, Epstein, Epstein. So that's the whole thing on Twitter about him. I was like, okay. I actually didn't see the Epstein thing with him, but I – is that true? I don't know. Everyone was friends with Epstein. And no one's calling out all the fucking people. Like, I would say on a conservative theory about Epstein that he tried to get tons of people into his ring. And couldn't do it because other people are going to be like, no, I'm not doing that. Well, see, I think he kept thinking. I think certain people were in and certain people weren't. Like, I think if you're friends with him, that doesn't necessarily mean you knew the whole story. That's what I'm saying. Yeah, of course. And I do. Here's the one thing. Like, I'm not conspiracy theory person at all, really. But immediately my instincts for seeing. I thought it was completely outside the norm for. New York media, American media, anything that we saw, the photos of his corpse in the paper and in public, that isn't done. No, that never happens here. Osama bin Laden or something like that is made once in a while. So I was like, wait, when is that ever done? And that's when I thought that was, if I was going to think anything, which I don't really. I'd be like, okay, it's weird that there was this big show of showing his body. Like, oh, he's dead. Who fucking knows? Maybe he paid the city $4 billion or whomever he'd have to pay. And then he's going to live somewhere. And there's this fake body. Yes, now we're talking. Now you're going off the deep end. That did occur to me because I thought it was strange. Who shows the corpse in the New York Post cover?

loaded face and like the rigor mortis. I was like, what the fuck is this? No, that's like some, that's some Europe only shit. Yeah. I feel like, yeah. Osama bin Laden was like the last time. We don't do that. So I was like, it's weird. Like someone really wants us to show that he's dead. Chris, where do you think Epstein is right now? I think Epstein is dead, to be honest. I do. Unless he's at the, I mean, I don't know. You really are a Republican. Yeah. Are you? No, no. Well, so is mine, but I'm from the South. I don't know. I have an excuse. Actually, my Southern family is Southern Democrat. Where are you from, D.C.? Yeah, but my mom's side of the family is in Virginia Beach. So it's not fully Southern, but it's very, I mean, they're all full, thick Southern accents. Yeah, my mom has a beautiful Southern drawl. Pardon? My mother has a beautiful Southern drawl. It's Georgia, right? Yeah, Atlanta, yeah. My, you know, do you know who Bill Bartholomew is? He just died. No. My friend's grandfather, but he was the chairman. He used to own the Braves, the Atlanta Braves. Oh, okay, okay, okay. He just died this week, not of corona, but. How much of a bummer would it be to die and not die of corona right now? I feel like people just wouldn't even care. Yeah, I mean, that's basically what happens to this guy. People care. Stop it. Seriously. What's been going on? I don't really have any other conspiracy theories. I think that Kim Kardashian lies like a sociopath and is one of those evil people. There we go. Just gets away with it. Like, how is she not being called as, like, everyone now is like, scammer, scammer. But the same millennials saying scammer to everyone. Like, Kim, we love you. Oh, we need to touch on, that reminds me, we need to touch on your now squashed beef with Caroline Calloway. Oh.

have any beef with it. Caroline plays her position with me very well. You know what I mean? I do know what you mean. She responds over me, so what am I going to do? Say I don't like her. I don't actually know her in person, but I didn't like that she was... I couldn't come out and say this, but I can say this on a podcast. I really had some issues with Elizabeth Wurtzel as a person and how she would deal with me. I knew her from before. I had a career, anything. She was always a fucking asshole to me. And just, like, so condescending, so not supportive of, like, anything. And then, like, and then after I had a career, like, was always trying to get herself compared to me. Not in a way that I'm saying, like, respect. Like, she has, like, a whole thing. Like, she's an icon in so many ways. Yeah. But then it was always the thing of her wanting me to say. that she opened doors to me i'm like yo we're like we're both fucking white women like the doors are open for us to be like and also like and i know who influenced me and it wasn't her like i didn't like those books i didn't like i don't like her whole heady like bruce springsteen like harvard like that's not my stuff like if that isn't what appeals to me you know like super political like that's not the kind of shit i read i'm a i'm brady's analysis style you know Like, I like, like, suntan cream and, like, party girls. Me too, sweetie. Go off. Me too. Me and Jason agree with you. We have the same taste. Like, I am not. Elizabeth Worsley did not influence me. Actually, I had, when I had one of her books, and it used to, and, like, I turned the cover inside out. Because I didn't like her, like, looking at me, like, from it. Like, it was so important. Like when you put your, the, the picture of your wife down when you're about to cheat on her in your house? Yeah, exactly. No, I turned it inside out. I had that before. And then, and I just, and then, so then I was like obsessed with not getting compared to her. So then she started like, she was always like, she asked me to, like I have, she, she blocked in my phone. She was when she died. Like I, like, because she would hound me for things and like wanting me to come to her apartment and like.

wanting me to write the intro for the new Prozac Nation. And, like, and I kept, in the meantime, I'd had this incident with her, like, years ago at, like, Pink Pony. Like, I had dinner with her and, like, this chick, Chrissy Miller, and, like, she had this rescue dog with her, like, her dog, like, I don't know. She was, like, she slipped out of the restaurant and, like, said she should be able to take the dog inside. And it was, like, really abusive and, like, crazy because she's, like, This is my service dog. She'd pull out, like, a letter from the psychiatrist. The whole thing was fucking nuts. And then she was an asshole to me and was so condescending. Like, she told me not to try to be a writer. Like, anything I try to write, like, we've already been done before and all this shit. It was just insane. So then, sorry, I'm, like, ramming. So when Caroline put you two together, you didn't like that? You know, my entire career, I told Simon Seusser, I was like, I don't want anyone comparing me to Elizabeth Wirtual. Like, I don't want that. And I managed to get through that whole thing. Not having really much anywhere. That is impressive. And I fucking snapped. Because she does. Caroline is very nefarious. She is a white witch. I would say that to her face. But that's cool. Like, Anita Palligord is like a black witch. You know? Well, she's cool. I mean, no question. Yeah. Caroline, she's really young. But what do you think Caroline, what do you think she's going to do? Like, how does she monetize? How does she do? Like, where does she go from here? She's real, from what I understand, and this made me kind of understand and like her more. I always thought she was just like a mess. But apparently, like, she's doing really well with the monetizing thing. Like, she's handling that shit. And she is making money. And so that's like... I don't necessarily even think that she should try to be a writer because writing is horrible. It's literally, at this point, at this, like, the book thing is the slowest, most agonizing, like, short. And it's the purest choice, maybe, like, the most, like, everable. Like, and I kind of went that way when everything popped up. I could have done a reality show, anything I wanted, you know. But I chose a book. It was horrible. Oh, it's very hard. I mean, it's much harder than a reality TV show. But what, are you going to write another book? Is that the plan? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

What's, I mean, have you started it? Is there an idea, an outline? Oh, no. I'm trying to work as much as it is possible to sell it because, you know, I got a reputation, rightly so. Like, I didn't, I was so fucked up back then. I couldn't, it took me, I think, like, three and a half years to turn it in. And I was just, like, on drugs. Like, I really was horrible to work with. And now I'm just trying to do as much up front to minimize risk and then sell it. I see. So you're going to do more than the three chapters. You're going to do as much as you can. I mean, I'd probably do at least five. That's a lot for me. That's a lot. I agree. I wouldn't do it rough. I would do it five chapters. What happened? Was there a TV show? Was there a show based on the book? Yeah, and that's still happening. It's just obviously things are slow. Are you involved in it or did you just sell it off? Okay, you're involved in it. I'm a producer. Okay, great. I'm writing it. But it's, you know, I pay for that as well in the early stages of that. But people always, like, don't understand how I make money. But that's really cool. And we have the stars, but I can't tell you. I can't tell you what it's all. But Star is also being a producer as well. And I love her. And it's so nice. I start, like, my producers, like, Chick Allison used to work. She did New York Minute, like, the ultimate movie. Oh, a classic. An absolute classic. That's a fucking classic. The Amanda Bynes movie. Is it what it's called? Yeah, She's the Man. That's available on Amazon streaming. I saw it last night. What's the timeline on this? Is it just going to take as long as it needs to take? I just got a big check for being late. Oh, I love that. Yeah. Living off of that right now. So, okay, so you got the TV show is going to happen eventually. Yeah. But you know what, career, it's like really, career is fucking empty. It just sounds really good. What do you mean? You're not feeling satisfied? It's fine, but it's just, that's why I'm putting it back to New York. I need to like hang out with my friends and everything. Well, I feel it.

I really want the art world to open. I want to go to Chelsea. I want to dress up. I want to walk around and get all the white wine. It sounds great. I want to smoke a cig on a sidewalk. Social activity and I'm totally going to be in charge of it when I'm back. Making everyone, people from Twitter, people from my phone. Everyone, like, speaking, like, let's go. Like, there's, like, let's go. How's it work? Like, you know, I mean, here, do this, and then you walk around. That's, like, my favorite thing in New York in the spring and the summer. Me, too. Goddamn, me, too. The winter is horrible. Like, I'm not going back to that fucking area anymore. Like, deep dish, like, 11th Avenue and 26th Street, like, in the wind tunnel. No, it's no man's land in the winter. I agree. It's dark as hell, yeah. Artichoke? You're not hitting artichoke for lunch, Kat? Really? I'm so fine. I'm kidding. The pizza place, the bad pizza place that's on 11th and 26th. The place that you get forced to go. Yeah, because there's no restaurants there. It's a no-man's land, like you said. It's a no-man's land unless you want to go to, like, Chelsea Market. Which is, like, this big-ass room with, like, twinkly fairy... It's where, like, Taylor Swift and Carly Boss used to go together all the time. Yo, how did Taylor Swift style me? do you think they were well if you watch the taylor swift documentary she's got the worst style of anyone in the history and her apartment is crazy everything she touches is ugly it's insane it's like i've never seen anything like it but Nancy Jo Stales, her article about Taylor back in the day, she had a topiary rabbit in her. Yes, but that's the whole thing. But it's like she pays somebody a million dollars to design some apartment and it's still ugly as fuck. Because she's driving it. It's wild. These ugly celebrity apartments are one of the ugliest I've ever seen. I think she sold it, but Cameron Diaz Kelly Wurstler apartment.

that she had for a while in New York was so ugly. I was like, is this even real? Or recently I was looking at the thing that Anne Hathaway just put on the market. And I was like, this is the weirdest fucking celebrity apart. It's like an Upper West Side thing. There's literally no kitchen. And then, and then there's like a two bedroom. And then I don't, maybe they don't, you know, they don't photograph an actor bedroom. It's like the actor's sacred space. But in the meantime, you're like, why would anyone, why would any celebrity live in this apartment? Like it's so weird. Well, you know, it's disheartening how bad their taste is. It really is. Well, Anne Hathaway used to own the fucking Dumbo Clock Tower apartment. Oh, I didn't know that. Which is where I wanted Kevin Durant to live. But I thought that was the perfect apartment for him. How are you doing without basketball right now? Pardon? How are you doing without basketball right now? I'm miserable there's no basketball. I'm legit obsessed. Like, I'm completely obsessed. I'm sure I sound like such a poser because, and all of my, like, graffiti writers, which is my main social, like, they all, none of them like basketball. So. And I think that's how, for, like, so many years, I, like, didn't have any friends, like, watching this and stuff. But now it's, like, all I think about. Every night I go to bed with, like, I watch, in this quarantine, yeah, I've been watching, like, TNT, like, really soothing. You know, Shaq and Charles and like, and EJ. Shaq and Charles. Yeah, Shaq and Charles. They have a good rapport. And like all of the things from like years ago. Do you think, you know, my favorite part about that group is that Ernie definitely has a hood pass now and it's very cool for him. As what? Ernie has a hood pass for sure. Oh, well, yeah, I mean, Ernie is cool. He's a real Christian. Oh, he is? His church is down there in Atlanta. Of course it is. Well, all churches are in Atlanta, so that makes sense. I was just on the website the other day, actually. And, yeah, Ernie's cool. Yeah, you're right there in Atlanta, right by the headquarters. I've seen Shaq a few times at the bar at the Four Seasons. You have? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I'm a big Chuck fan. Yeah. That's really cool.

I really love him. I've always liked him because he's kind of dumb. Michael Jordan came to Bay in Miami one time when I was there. He walked in and the whole club was like, God, I was 23. That was my big moment. Yeah, so that's what I watched. So, I mean, I think we've gotten the full Kat Marnell report, quarantine Kat report. And honestly, it sounds like you're doing pretty good. Oh, good. Well, I'm glad. My phone, by the way, is good at 10%. for the past 25 minutes. God intervened. He let us rock. Did we cover everything? Yeah, I think so. Well, we can definitely have you back on whenever you'd like to if you want. Well, I'm going to be here. This is your quarantine podcast. Well, I feel like I didn't talk to you guys about you enough. That's the other thing about traveling. You're by yourself all the time and then you lose your social skills. It's okay. These people that listen to this three times a week definitely know too much about us already. It's not really a big deal. Well, I love listening to you guys. I think you're really funny. Thank you so much. T-Y-S-M. Okay. Well, if you need anything else for me, just let me know. Thanks for accommodating my technological problems. You need to tell people where they can find you on the internet. Oh, on Twitter at Kat underscore. Marnell. And I'm on Instagram. But I don't have Instagram on my phone. I only have one app at a time. So I'll erase Venmo to get Instagram. Just now I have to erase Instagram to download Google Chat. No, no. That's not true. I have nothing. Oh, and my My button doesn't work, like my home button. So I have to do a home button on the screen. You can cue it up so it's a dot. So if I do screen grabs, I always have a big dot on them. The assistive touch. Love that. Yeah, I do that. Jesus Christ. Okay, well, whoever's listening, buy Kat a new phone. Get her some AirPods so she can stop putting her phone down her sports bra. We're going to get you all set up for 2020, Kat.

I would love, like, an iPhone or, like, a computer that was from 2016. Or, like, an iPhone from two years ago and not three. Then you'd be really doing it. Exactly. Yeah. Then you'd be killing it. I don't need anything. I mean, the 6 is very impressive. Listen, this thing is not bad. I don't like you can't take pictures of the moon. Like, I wish I could have the phone that takes the pictures of the moon. That's my main issue with this phone. We got to get you a camera. I know, right? Imagine. Kat, thanks again. Honestly, you're a legend. We're really happy you're able to do that. Thanks, guys. I'll come on anytime. All right. We'll call you back soon. Thanks again. Okay. Bye. Bye-bye.